my feelings sort of got sorted out for the past few days... my mum had knew about it. of course she was initially shocked and disapproved with it.. but i think she is still trying to accept the fact now..time is what i think everybody needs now. i just hope she can accept it... the first few days for her to accept was not that easy, she nagged and even chided me. She doesn't think agree with the 'trend'. and i promised her that it will never and NOT affect my studies especially.
at that moment i felt so confused, insecured and did not know what to do... i cried.. i bled...should i just gave up just like that?! but i was glad i sorted it out, and now just let nature take its course.

my brother went for camp for the past few days and my dad was on a 9 month course. so both of them were not at home for dinner for the past few days. The night was especially quiet without my bro. cause he was usually the noise-maker in the family. however without him the past few nights, the house didn't seem right. and i felt rather guilty for leaving my mum alone at home without anyone's accompany. blegh! i think i should have spend more time with her instead of hiding inside my room rushing out tutorials, surfing the net after i got home.